I had some very random dreams last night: one involved a huge worm (see MIB II that I watched a couple of days ago) eating little by little a city that was built right over the ocean. I had to keep jumping from building to building. Then I had some friends visit and two were dating that I never would have expected. It was a little freaky.
It's so funny to me that I'm living in one of the most beautiful places on the west coast and I can only stand it for a few weeks at a time. I'm so excited to be leaving on Sunday!!
I get to see my parents the whole time I'm in San Francisco, which will make my audition/vacation even more fun, and then when I go to Eastman I get to see the fabulous Jennifer Smith (and her new boyfriend - I will be playing the 'you-need-to-gain-my-approval' friend).
On a similar note, Southwest is having a sale from LA to Denver for $79 one way... what thinkest thou, oh fellow red-headed kindred spirit?
I'm applying for a second job, but I'm in the middle of interviews and I don't want to say what it is in case I jinx it... but I will be really stoked if I get it.
I've been looking at cars, just because I will need one for three out of the five schools I've applied to and would really like to own my own car. The list includes:
Toyota RAV4
Toyota Corolla
Honda Civic
Mazda 3
I either want a cute little four-door that gets good MPG and is safe and reliable, or a mini-SUV of the same criteria. My dad really is pulling for the RAV4 just because it's higher up and supposedly safer that way. Toyota is supposed to be one of the best companies out there. I was looking at Ford Focus for a while, but no one puts it on their "best" lists. Sad/ironic that the ones that are are all foreign. But Toyota and Honda have done my family well, so I'll probably carry on the tradition.
All this means that when I drive up from LA next Saturday, I'm going to go test-driving!! I've never done that before! Another item to check off the "now I'm truly a grown-up" list.
With the discovery of Double Rainbow ice cream (sold in Trader Joe's - if you have one, go out right now and buy a whole pint of whatever flavor you want) and it's pure heavenly taste, along with my obsession with French, I thought this was appropriate:
| Your Icecream Flavour is... French Vanilla! |
 You're a smooth and silky suave type! You exude class and you believe in tradition. A classical taste who doesn't like things to be too flashy or showy. Climb the Eiffel tower of taste with a spoonfull of you! Oui Oui! |
Find out at Go Quiz
This beautiful Sunday morning all I have done is finish a chick book that never fails to make me cry so that the words become blurry, watched a movie, made a breakfast scramble from scratch, and sip green tea listening to some feel-good songs on the radio.
Some days I wonder if all this sitting around is laziness and whether I've been wasting my time in California. Given, I have progressed very far in my musical studies, but I'm not the musician that spends hours upon hours in the practice room. So what have I done with all of my spare time?
But every time that I start to berate myself, I realize that life could hit me square in the face any time soon with school, a family, or a career that is just around the corner. And then I'll look back on this year as a time to really get to know myself, have time to focus on what I want out of life, and become a stronger person. I feel like I've grown so much over the past few months. I've had a lot of life experiences that I'm ashamed of, but that have made me a whole lot stronger in my convictions.
I've also found the difference between spending time with people just to be social and spending time with them because they are really quality. In college, I was so spoiled because everyone that I surrounded myself with were quality people that shared my interests and were willing to be silly, honest, and spontaneous. When you're not in a school setting, it's so much harder to find people like that and it's even harder to find time to spend with them because of conflicting work schedules and the like. But on reflection, I have found a very few people that I turn to in different moods and situations: One I can vent to and who talks with me about any life decision with honesty, one I could spend hours talking to just because we share so many similar interests and outlooks on life, and one shares my love of Carolina basketball and can share memories of our beloved Chapel Hill.
However, there is this little ache for the old times, the old friends that shows up from time to time.
I also yearn for someone to share my everyday life with. Little things like all of the amazing dishes that I'm learning to make from scratch with whatever I have in the kitchen. I feel so accomplished and want someone to revel in my cooking genius. I want to be able to share stories from work, the nice couple that gave me a sip of their wine, or the lady that complained about me for 10 minutes. I'm learning so much about myself that I'm ready to share it because I finally feel good about the decisions I make (mostly), have learned to like me and all my quirks, and am a little sick of being alone most of the time.
I honestly think I was born in the wrong time period - I needed to grow up in the 1930s or 40s when girls were getting married at 19 or 20. But then I wouldn't be able to play my flute and I probably would be a cooking, baby-making, and cleaning machine. Blech.
Today is my day off. I have never been so excited about a day since probably Christmastime.
During the past two days, I have been on my feet for 24 hours and have been at my restaurant for 22 of those hours. And the really ironic part is that out of my 4 shifts, last night was the easiest and most fun for me. I only had 4 tables in my section, which meant that I didn't have to rush around like crazy and actually got to converse with the people that were out for Valentine's Day. And everyone was super nice.
However, by the end of the night, I was so bone tired that I fell asleep instantly. Of course, the fact that I stayed up til 4 am talking and had a heavy sedative helped the situation.
So my Valentine's Day was quite pleasant - even though almost everyone that I work with has a sig. other, we all went out afterwards and just hung out together. It was a nice sense of comradeship. Honestly, it was just another day for me and I really didn't feel like I was missing out on anything.
However, I did buy the cutest earrings for the occasion. They are long, dangly, red and white hearts and they look sweet with my all black. I got compliments all night ;)
I'm still a little groggy, so I don't have anything too intelligent or thought-provoking to post right now. Hurray for days off!!
After spending you-don't-want-to-know-how-long on this website, I felt the need to post the end result:
Me posing - as an M&M - in front of an ancient Mayan ruin in Belize, the country on the top of my to-visit list. I really wish I had shoes that color.
I am officially halfway through my auditions, with what is, in my mind, the two hardest left. But I have had very encouraging signs along the way that say that I am ready for whatever I may face in the next few weeks.
In my audition today, the professor echoed what the teacher at USC said, which was, in essence 'I think you're a good player and want to say that I will take you, but I can't commit since the auditions aren't over yet.' While this may sound flakey to anyone not in the music world, this is one of the biggest signs of encouragement. She even made sure that I knew she was serious because she added that she really doesn't like to say anything to candidates, but that I had "drastically improved." From either this summer or last year's audition, I'm not sure which.
Sorry, I'm not trying to toot my own horn. Au contraire, I'm trying to pump myself up for the two schools that would probably be my top two if I had to make a list of which I want to attend. But frankly, after being told most of my music life that I have potential but that I still need a lot of work, it's nice to actually have some of my work pay off.
I'm not counting any chickens yet though.
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As my reward, I went out and saw a movie by myself. Since I had gone to the awards show that honored him at SBIFF, I figured I should go see Dreamgirls that was directed by Bill Condon. I really liked it! Very well acted, and although I understand star status, Jennifer Hudson really should have been one of the first shown in the credits instead of being listed after all the major stars with much more insignificant roles. But, she wasn't an actress before, so I understand. Wow, she totally deserves all these awards she's getting. Can anyone tell me why she's supporting actress and Beyonce is lead actress? Is it because of name recognition? But honestly, everyone did a great job. Eddie Murphy wasn't Eddie Murphy for once. In fact, I'm not sure he had a single comedic line.
Oh, and I cried at the end (well, got choked up and slightly teary which is saying a lot for me), so that's a sign of a good movie, since I'm a rock normally.
As a side note, I saw a sign in a bookstore that said:
"Don't judge a book by it's movie."
I thought that was pretty clever.
Is it just me, or do the two seem to go hand in hand a lot more often nowadays? It's like either movies are made from books that were bestsellers only the year before, or books are written based on movies. I can't walk into Borders any more without seeing a whole section called "In the Movies."
Today marked the beginning of my mini-vacation and I'm very excited about the way that it has started out .
I finishe my lunch shift and ordered a chicken caeser salad which was exactly what I wanted. You know how important that is.
Then I came home and chilled out for a couple hours and then watched the Duke UNC game that was nerve-wracking and amazing all at once. We totally dominated in the second half and our comeback was so thrilling since the one and only time I ever watched a game was one of our three losses out of 23 games. My friend and I went to a bar and grabbed a drink to celebrate.
However.
The bar that we went to is known for making the stiffest drinks in town, and folks, I'm glad I love gin. Because that's basically all that was in my drink. With a touch of tonic and some lime juice. A good 6 oz. of gin. Yeah.
Then I went to my friend, Bri's party in her room for having finally cleaned it after 6 months. It looks beautiful. I had two very stiff White Russians and we "watched" Lost and South Park and then retreated upstairs to debate everything from gossip at work, to yoga, to how we've changed from high school. It was a great night. And I met their cute (boy) roommate who happens to work as an architect and who I got to share my newfound love of The Fountainhead with.
I'm leaving for LA, then Austin tomorrow. I love to fly! I love vacation!
My bad, Apple doesn't make minis anymore. But a nano would be just as cool and it can still hold up to 2,000 songs. And I could get it in electric blue.
Today was just one of those days that, as my co-worker so succinctly put it, I wish I hadn't gotten up.
My brain was totally not in gear at any point in the day and I would constantly catch myself hanging up clothes that were dirty, driving down a street without paying attention, and staring off into space. It's like I was on auto pilot but my brain forgot to start the engine.
It started out as a so-so day. Not bad, not good.
I sounded okay (flute-wise), but not spectacular and I really couldn't convince myself to buckle down and work on something. My workout was okay, but I didn't really feel great afterwards. I went food shopping and only got necessary stuff, which is always boring. (Let me insert what an amazing store Trader Joe's is ... I got my week's worth of groceries for $13. But then again, I'm leaving town on Thursday, so that's not fabulous).
Then the day got progressively worse.
Folks, I've had two deaths in my life in the past 5 hours. Don't get too concerned, they're not people or anything.
My mom called me after work and told me that our oldest cat, Molly, had died this morning. Apparently my dad sent me an email telling me because he couldn't even get on the phone to tell me. She lived a very full life - she was 13 - and I was sort of expecting it just because she hasn't been looking great the past few times I've been home. In fact, I think I'm okay about it, but I'm really concerned about my dad. Literally this is like losing a child for him. If you've had a pet die that was like a family member, then you understand. She was so spoiled by him and could get away with anything. Add to that the fact that he's alone b/c my mom is in San Francisco and you can imagine what he's going through. I wish I could hop a plane just to be there.
The second death was tragic as well. Actually, they're on two completely different planes so I'm not even going to compare them. My iPod's hard drive crashed. This implies clicking noises and a screen with a picture of an iPod that has crosses for eyes and a tongue sticking out. I'm not kidding. There's nothing I can do b/c it's not on warranty anymore and a new hard drive would cost about half as much as a new iPod. I've been contemplating getting a mini instead since they apparently only last for 2 years anyway and I'll never be able to fill up an iPod like the one that died in 2 years. I just don't listen to that much music, but the stuff I do listen to is really important. I use that thing daily... grrrrr.
The only good parts of my day were that I got a bonus on my check that I wasn't expecting and that I made some money at work tonight and got to keep it all since I was the only one working.
I'm hoping that tomorrow will be an improvement...
I'm sooooo ready for bed. But I feel like blogging because I'm on that very fine line between awake and comotose. Well, really I blame it on the Red Bull and vodka that was my first drink of the evening/morning.
It is so easy to just walk into parties if you know the right ones to go to. Don't get me wrong - I'm not a crasher, but if I was, the one I was working at would have been perfect. Just dress in black and say that you're catering or with the caterers and BAM you're in! It worked for me... except I was with them. But man, a party with free food and apps is the place to be around 12:30 because everyone is leaving and the alcohol is flowing freely. Oh gosh, now I sound like an alcoholic. I'm at the point where I'm ready to delete my entry, but I think it will be much more entertaining this way.
I spent the night passing food, saying/yelling over and over what I was serving, and flirting with the cute boys that can afford $2000 tickets to get them into parties such as this. The VIP room was a joke or at least I didn't know any of them, but I think I saw Steven Spielberg. Not sure though.
My chef is known for drinking on the job, so when he asked me to get him two drinks, I was not surprised. I was surprised when he hands one to me and one to another girl I work with and says, Cheers. I'm starting to like this grizzly bear man more and more. He's a grizzly bear b/c he's gruff on the outside and hard to get to know, but really is just a teddy bear.
Oh gosh, I'm rambling. I think I just need to go to bed. Well, fun reading. Or deciphering. Actually, I'm typing pretty well. Good night!
I smell like Pina Coladas. Sweeet. Literally.
I am having major problems motivating myself to practice this week. I need to keep reminding myself that just because I had a good audition doesn't mean that I actually got in. Also, I just made a reservation for renting a car in Texas and will be spending an extra $80 not to mention gas down to L.A. So that's some good motivation right there - it'd be really great if I didn't spend all that money for nothing.
Instead I've been baking, cooking, getting my tax return together, and working out to avoid practicing. Oh, add to that blogging. I'm going, I'm going, but I'm not going willingly quite yet...